When I was a teenager, I was diagnosed with PCOS. I had no idea what that meant until July 2008 when my hubs and I decided to start a family. We thought on our one year anniversary, August 2008, we would have a positive prego test for our present.
August came and to my surprise, Aunt Flo (AF) visited. September came and no AF. Much to my disappointment, no positive prego test. October came. Same thing. November. Same. December. Same. January came and I was fed up. I went to my dr and she gave me Provera to start AF along with Clomid. February 2009-January 2010 came and went with no success.
Let's throw a few unsuccessful Artifitial Insemenations into the mix. Let's throw in two sisters being pregnant, one sister-in-law pregnant, and one sister-in-law adopting. I was spent. We opted out of a third AI to save us the heartbreak. Sister number 1 just had her baby and my heart was broken. That should have been me in that hospital. The hubs knew my heartache and had a romantic bedroom set up that night. That's the night we conceived!! Yeah baby!
We were shocked. Happily shocked. We then decided to build a house. February 2010 could not get any better. A baby on the way and a house in construction. March 9,2010 I was having some trouble and decided to go to the dr. No heartbeat. March 10,2010 I had a D&C and my baby was gone. The upside to all that was getting my percocets! lol Just kidding.
We are now on Femara and boy am I hormonal and emotional. We will be going through AI #3 next week and are hopeful with that 'procedure' coupled with Femara things will work. We have decided if it doesn't work, then we are done...for now. We will never quit. But to go on to the next step, we need somewhere around $20,000 to go through In Vitro Fertilization.
That's our infertile story in a nut shell.
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You and Harv are always in my mind and prayers. I am so sorry and can't imagine all the pain you two are going through. I love all the scriptures that you have on your side bar. They are very inspiring and I hope that they bring you comfort during a difficult time. We love you guys!!!
ReplyDeleteGet over it and be happy with what you have. You have a husband and a new house. It's obviously not the right time so get over it.
ReplyDeleteMonica...you truly are in my prayers...I think about you often and I KNOW you will be a mom. Soon. Hang in there, hard to hear I am sure but it will happen. It will be all the sweeter when it does, you will truly be one of those moms that NEVER takes her little ones for granted.
ReplyDeletewell tuds, I guess some tards just don't get how important it is to have a family.
ReplyDeleteI don't know who "Setitup123" is but telling you to just get over it is insane. Kind of hard to just get over it, when it is on your mind 24/7!
ReplyDeleteMonica, you are an awesome person and I know that things will one day get better! They always do. Until that day, know that you and Harv are in our prayers and we love you both!
Monica, I guess I could tell Setitup123 that they should just be glad they haven't been diagnosed with a grade IV brain tumor like I have been. And then someone could tell me that I should be glad that my grade IV brain tumor hasn't left me paralyzed like theirs did. And then a widow could tell that person they should be glad to be paralyzed and still alive, unlike her husband, who died within a couple of months. And then someone could tell her that she should be glad her husband was only dead and not unfaithful or abusive like hers was. And so on. We all have something to mourn and also something to be grateful for. I think your blog expresses both understandable grief and steadfast faith, and is probably helping someone (probably many someones) just by letting them know that they aren't alone, and they don't have to be knocked "out". ((HUGS)) and God bless! - Krista (from 2ofus4now)
ReplyDeleteI agree with Krista... it's not about "comparing pains". To each person the pain is significant and sharp and we should not compare woes. We should, instead, be sharing hugs and helping support one another.
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